Madison Beer had to “fall back in love” with herself after being subjected to intense public scrutiny.
The 21-year-old singer has said she lost touch of who she was in recent years because she spent too much time focusing on “proving” herself to her critics, and is now on the path to learning self-love again.
She said: “For a long time, I have been at war with myself. So much of who I am is grounded in paradox. I used to think love was a type of self-sacrifice. That I had to offer up a part of myself, to edit, and mold, and shift myself, to fit a certain ideal.
“I have had times where I gave up so much of myself to others that it felt like I could not recognize myself in the mirror. Sometimes, I feel that I am being seen for all the wrong things and that I have fallen into a cycle of having to prove myself over and over again.”
Madison says learning to love herself meant getting back in touch with her “values” and the things she “enjoys”, as well as ensuring she always stays “genuine”.
She added: “Falling back in love with myself meant remembering what I value, by relearning the things that I enjoy, and by speaking and acting in a way that feels genuine to me. I learned to trust my intuition. My mu shifted once I realized that all the parts of myself that I have been taught to censor my entire life were what was missing in my heart.”
The ‘Selfish’ hitmaker also said she struggled with fame at first because she was thrust into the spotlight at a young age, but admitted her experiences have made her who she is today.
Speaking in her new Vevo short film, ‘Madison Beer – Dreams Look Different in the Distance’, she explained: “I came to this industry very, very young and it moves so fast that sometimes you lose yourself in the process, it feels inevitable. For a long time. I thought that the only way to be successful was to be a chameleon to what everyone else wanted from me. I started playing a character so that I could offer her up to the public so that when she was scrutinized, it hurt less.
“How much of who I am today is shaped by what I’ve been through and it has allowed me to speak openly about my mental health. However scary that it might be, I feel that I’m doing my fans a disservice if I’m not being honest. Why would I not take advantage of the chance to make them feel less alone, to make them feel seen?
“For a long time, I was floating but now I feel that I’ve sort of planted my feet on solid ground again and I know who I am, in case anything ever threatens that. I have a feeling that I will be OK but I won’t spoil the ending for you.”