Gabourey Sidibe used bulimia as a “self-defence mechanism”.
The ‘Empire’ star has revealed she used to suffer from the eating disorder, and would use it to help her cope with sadness and “survive the day”.
Speaking to her ‘Empire’ co-star Taraji P. Henson on an upcoming episode of ‘Peace of Mind with Taraji’ for Facebook Watch, she said: “It was about me surviving the day. It was about controlling this emotion that was uncontrollable. I hated this emotion so much, I hated it.
“I found a button, and on top of that people were like ‘You’re looking good.’ You know? So why would I stop? It’s like, this was dope, in a way. It was like a self-defence mechanism, that’s what bulimia was for me. It wasn’t about losing weight, it wasn’t about controlling my appetite, it truly was about how it stopped me from crying.”
And although Gabourey thought she was in control of her emotions at the time, she now understands she was actually “getting worse”.
She added: “I was not, I was getting worse. Being depressed is one thing, but if you add an eating disorder to that, that’s a whole other monster that you have to fight.”
Meanwhile, the 37-year-old ‘Precious’ actress – who recently got engaged to Brandon Frankel – previously opened up about her mental health and eating disorder struggles in her 2017 memoir, ‘This Is Just My Face: Try Not To Stare’.
She wrote at the time: “There’s nothing ugly about me. Anyone trying to convince me that I am – and it’s usually me – is wasting her time. I was in a war with my body for a long time. If I’d started treating it better sooner, I wouldn’t have spent so many years hating myself. But I love my body now.”